Coaching Archives - Allison Crow

Attractor vs Enroller: A Distinction for Us Both

allisoncrow — Sun, 25 Aug 2024 17:04:42 +0000

A distinction for your consideration: Attractor vs. Enroller

Yesterday was a bingo ball day where all my ideas just bounced around in the bingo ball hopper – none fully

dropped into the final chute. I looked through some recent journals to slow down and connect with my own wisdom.

I came across a note to myself that reminded me, in my coaching practice, I am an

ATTRACTOR

not an

ENROLLER

It was just the SELF-TRUST reminder I needed.

ENROLLER is the formula for what many of us are taught to do in sales—to get people to go through a sales funnel that leads to a sales consultation, where the goal is to “convert” the prospect to a client. Then, handle and overcome objections and close the sale.

This can be effective for many salespeople, but it is also what feels disingenuous and smarmy to others.

ATTRACTOR is a way of being and marketing that feels more natural to me and encourages responsibility and self-trust in potential clients. Yes, I have expert skills, AND the client’s concerns and objections are considered and valid. A right fit is more important than “closing the sale.”

It is often unclear what I do or offer professionally, and I’m sure I leave money on the table. I know this is not the best sales practice (I taught sales for YEARS).

I am quirky and strange, and when potential clients call, if they are with someone who doesn’t know me, isn’t familiar with me, or hasn’t seen or heard me speak or teach, it is always AWKWARD. Even referrals from beloved clients can be strange – not because of the other person but because of me. I’m weird. And I’m incredibly nervous, and my “sense of being perceived” rises when I’m around new people.

Last year, I had a series of “cold discovery calls” that I think came through tiktok, which was so awkward. I was awkward.

Coaching is not a mechanical process for me—it’s a relational process, and I’m weird at the beginning of relationships, even if I don’t want to be. Hello AUDHD.

I can now see it’s a bottom-up process, and I desire that both ways. I’m probably not your best fit if you are a top-down linear thinker.

Most, not all, of the people I work well with have known and “followed” me for years. Sometimes ten or more years – The quiet watchers routinely come out when THEY are ready and say, “I want to work with you.” They are the ones that end up in transformative years or more long engagements – doing deep inner and outer work. By the time they go to my coaching page and request a connection and discovery session – they know they want to work with me in the direction of their dreams and well-being.

I know I’m not super direct, and, when you are ready, I’m here, and we can talk and create a custom program for you.

I shared this because this week, I was able to help a client see that they are more of a Gardner in their business, too, not a machine. What I call “capitalism brain” is a subconscious influence that always pushing the machine. But there IS a place for those of us who are gardeners to cultivate in our lives and work.

Maybe you need to be reminded that you are a gardener, and you can do what you do. You can keep sharing your heart, showing your work, and making warm invitations, and the right clients will bloom at the right time.

Enroller or attractor – one is not better than the other, but one is more authentic to me and more congruent with my system and my way of being and creating in the world.

Remember who YOU are, and go do your thing!

The post Attractor vs Enroller: A Distinction for Us Both appeared first on Allison Crow.

Healing & Finding Hope After the Hard: Colette Nies Von Hanna, Socio-Ecological Feminist Theologian

Elyse Rich — Mon, 12 Aug 2024 13:36:40 +0000

Healing and Hope after Hard Journies with Colette Nies Von Hanna

Navigating Life’s Challenges: A Conversation with Colette Nies Von Hanna

Join me for a conversation with long-time family friend Colette Nies Von Hanna, who shares her journey and insights on being human. Colette, an organic gardener, socio-ecological feminist theologian, and energy researcher from New Braunfels, Texas, discusses the interconnection of ecological trauma and personal experiences. She reflects on her career shifts, including a political run, her academic pursuits, and community gardening efforts involving personal, professional, and spiritual growth. Colette shares her struggle with cancel culture, dealing with political and personal attacks, and the importance of self-awareness in activism and community involvement. She emphasizes the importance of resilience, authenticity, and vision despite facing extreme adversity and the challenges of social expectations.

Colette Nies Von Hanna, MSSW, MDIV

Activist, Socio-Ecological Feminist Theologian, Energy Researcher, Social Worker, Chaplain, 3rd Gen Organic Gardener, Aspiring Urban Farmer, Adoptive Mom, River-Goer, Rabble-Rouser, Bleeding Heart, who loves strong coffee and long naps.

The quote mentioned from my friend Justin’s LinkedIn page:

“To the people who are emotionally sensitive, who care so much about everything no matter how hard they try not to, who notice even the smallest things and take everything to the heart, the struggle is valid. I hope you get surrounded with people who are kind enough to understand you and even if you can’t expect everyone to adjust for you, I hope you get extra patience from this world.”

— Kylie Yzobelle

Key Topics and Timestamps

00:00 Introduction and Guest Introduction

01:08 Colette’s Background and Work

03:48 Personal and Professional Challenges

07:02 Running for Office and Facing Adversity

09:27 Navigating Political, Academic, and Spiritual Struggles

13:01 Reflections on Pain, Privilege, and Growth

25:14 Systemic Issues and Personal Resilience

29:46 The Weight of Awareness

30:38 Embracing Sadness and Hope

32:14 Understanding Bypassing

33:25 Facing Trauma and Healing

36:21 The Journey from Head to Heart

37:35 Learning to Feel and Express Emotions

48:13 Building a SELF-Centered Legacy

* Visit: Website: /

* Find out more about 1:1 coaching with Allison /coachingwallison/

* Internal Family Systems Coaching and a brief IFS Model Overview /ifs/

* Get your copy of UNARMORED: Finding Home in the Wild Edge of Being Human

/unarmoredthebook/

https://www.tiktok.com/@allison_crow

https://www.instagram.com/allison_crow/

https://www.facebook.com/wildesgesofbeinghuman

The post Healing & Finding Hope After the Hard: Colette Nies Von Hanna, Socio-Ecological Feminist Theologian appeared first on Allison Crow.

Lessons Learned from Gabor Mate & Compassionate Inquiry

Elyse Rich — Sun, 30 Jun 2024 14:55:10 +0000

Welcome back! In today’s episode, I delve into lessons I’ve learned from one of my favorite teachers and approaches ~ Gabor Maté and Compassionate Inquiry.

I explore his method as a facilitator, the importance of gaining consent, his views on addiction as attempts to solve suffering, and authenticity versus attachment. Reflecting on his teachings, I discuss the impact of the “still-face experiment” and how connection to self is crucial in our healing journeys. I’ll also share insights on over-functioning as a coping mechanism and Gabor’s perspective on thriving in a sick world. Join me as we reconnect with ourselves and each other.

00:00 Introduction to Gabor Maté and Compassionate Inquiry

00:45 Facilitation Techniques and Interruptions

02:37 The Role of Consent in Facilitation

03:07 Understanding Addiction and Suffering

06:56 The Still Face Experiment

10:23 Authenticity vs. Attachment

18:01 Overfunctioning and Coping Mechanisms

20:46 The Impact of a Sick World on Emotional Health

22:45 Present Moment Awareness and Self-Connection

The Still Face Experiment: https://youtu.be/YTTSXc6sARg?si=9a1-oDJfE69BESL-

Gabor Maté Website: https://drgabormate.com/

The Myth Of Normal: https://amzn.to/3zoVdmc

Compassionate Inquiry: https://compassionateinquiry.com/

* Visit: Website: /

* Find out more about 1:1 coaching with Allison /coachingwallison/

* Internal Family Systems Coaching and a brief IFS Model Overview /ifs/

* Get your copy of UNARMORED: Finding Home in the Wild Edge of Being Human

/unarmoredthebook/

https://www.tiktok.com/@allison_crow

https://www.instagram.com/allison_crow/

https://www.facebook.com/wildesgesofbeinghuman

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Crafting Authentic Confidence: Working With Overthinking Parts

allisoncrow — Thu, 16 May 2024 18:57:11 +0000

Who are my fellow humans with strong and vocal Overthinking Parts?nbsp; (I capitalize these to represent the personification of these parts of us).

Overthinking is a conversation with oneself that too often goes unmonitored. As those thoughts can run amok, they can activate even more Anxious Parts, or Shame.

And guess what It’s not about quieting the noise; it’s about understanding and really hearing the message and truth these parts have for us. After a lifetime of trying to contol these parts, what my clients and I now know, is that these parts need our connection and attunement. They are craving our connection and curiosity, not control.

As a seasoned coach, I’ve learned that addressing overthinking requires compassion, and a new inner conversation. Engage with your inner protectors—Procrastination, Distraction, Avoidance—with curiosity and kindness. Want to know how to turn these parts into allies for your well-being and your business’s success I’m here to help you learn to hear and trust your own true self.

Here’s a journal prompt to explore and connect within. Reminder, have a direct conversaion with this overthinking part vs “thinking about or over analizying the Overthinker.”

Hello Overthinking,

I see you.

I will not leave you.

I am here for you.

What would you like me to know

What do you need me to understand about your fears and concerns?

I am listening and will just take in your message – without trying to fixe you.

I am here.

This is the advanced personal development I do with business owners, executives, and leaders . If you would like to explore coaching, find out more here: /coachingwallison/

The post Crafting Authentic Confidence: Working With Overthinking Parts appeared first on Allison Crow.

Insights From Re-Blooming My Business

Elyse Rich — Mon, 11 Mar 2024 14:43:09 +0000

Allison shares her personal journey of reinventing herself and her business,
discussing her struggles, coping mechanisms, and the need for genuine connections.

She emphasizes the importance of understanding one’s needs and cycles, challenging toxic individualism,
and finding what works authentically for oneself in business and life.

Key Topics and Timestamps

00:00 Welcome to the Live Session: Embracing Spring and Personal Insights

00:45 Journey Through Deep Self-Care and Spiritual Awakening

02:51 Understanding Coping Mechanisms and Embracing Humaness

04:34 The Transformation: From Personal Struggles to Spiritual Reintegration

07:57 Rebuilding Business and Personal Growth Amidst Challenges

12:02 Embracing Prosperity and Connection: A New Approach to Business

18:35 Breaking Free from Conventional Rules: Authentic Content Creation

20:39 Navigating the Achievement Phase: Letting Go of Old Paradigms

22:09 The One-to-Many Model and Its Limitations

23:54 Unlocking the Power of Personal Reinvention

24:37 Navigating Business with Personalized Strategies

26:20 Embracing Individuality in Business and Life

30:13 Challenging Societal Norms and Personal Development Myths

36:17 Understanding Variance and Supporting Personal Ebbs and Flows

42:14 Rebloom: Embracing Sovereignty and Spring Renewal

Mentioned In The Episode:

The Post about Poker and Variation from my colleague, Mike Harris

The Self-Lead Humans in Business Facebook Group

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Resources:

Visit: Website: www.allisoncrow.com
Find out more about 1:1 coaching with Allison
Internal Family Systems coaching and a brief IFS Model Overview
Get your copy of UNARMORED: Finding Home in the Wild Edge of Being Human

The post Insights From Re-Blooming My Business appeared first on Allison Crow.

EASE From The Inside Out

Elyse Rich — Thu, 22 Feb 2024 15:15:07 +0000

It’s Road Riff time – Ease from the Inside Out.

I’ve had some really interesting, unusual resistance around content creation
and I didn’t have an “episode,” but I did have a drive into town

Stream of Consciousness with a Purpose and More at Ease

I want to be more at ease this year from the inside
It’s one of the core goals of how and who I want to be

This riff is inspired by Gabor Mate, Authenticity & Internal Family Systems

Love,

Allison

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Resources:

Visit: Website: www.allisoncrow.com
Find out more about 1:1 coaching with Allison
Internal Family Systems coaching and a brief IFS Model Overview
Get your copy of UNARMORED: Finding Home in the Wild Edge of Being Human

The post EASE From The Inside Out appeared first on Allison Crow.

Procrastination or Parts: The Mind Fu&k of Starting Again

Elyse Rich — Sun, 11 Feb 2024 21:21:38 +0000

Yikes – Is it Procrastination or Parts- I’m jumping back into making podcast episodes for you!

I’m just going to allow myself to be imperfect in getting back into the routine

I love creating content for y’all
I’ve always loved creating content for y’all
and I’ve had some procrastination parts come up lately

I had all these plans and was taking no action – Highly unusual for me.

After a couple of weeks of this procrastination, I sat down to do my parts work practices as I normally do, and my shoulders were aching
and I decided to see if it was a part.

I slowed down and connected with myself and my body.
Hello, shoulders. I see you.
Hello, tightness, stiffness and pain. I see you

What is it you want me to know?nbsp;

Enjoy this episode and a few of the deeper things I’ve learned from this thing called life over the last few months.

Love,

Allison

Prefer Video Watch this episode on my YouTube Channel here:

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Resources:

Visit: Website: www.allisoncrow.com
Find out more about 1:1 coaching with Allison
Internal Family Systems Coaching and a brief IFS Model Overview
Get your copy of UNARMORED: Finding Home in the Wild Edge of Being Human

The post Procrastination or Parts: The Mind Fu&k of Starting Again appeared first on Allison Crow.

Bug Soup & Updates

Elyse Rich — Mon, 06 Nov 2023 16:49:08 +0000

Hello Hello Humans!

I feel like a little kid getting back on a bicycle,
It’s been a couple of months since I podcasted.

Bug Soup is the time during chrysalis when the caterpillar disintegrates and devolves
and physically, materially turns into an gooey mess before it regenerates into the butterflies that bless us all.

It’s a metaphor for a stage of creation and a stage of life.

Who else is in and has been in Bug Soup?

I have been for quite some time.

It feels like whack a mole and it is just life.

I just want to acknowledge the humanity of seasons of Bug Soup no matter what causes them.

Love,

Allison

_______________________________________________________________________________________

Resources:

Visit: Website: www.allisoncrow.com
Find out more about 1:1 coaching with Allison
Internal Family Systems Coaching and a brief IFS Model Overview
Get your copy of UNARMORED: Finding Home in the Wild Edge of Being Human

The post Bug Soup & Updates appeared first on Allison Crow.

If You Can’t Lead Clients with SELF-TRUST What is the Real Agenda in Coaching?

allisoncrow — Mon, 23 Oct 2023 17:17:40 +0000

A few months ago, I was offered a partnership as the VP of a newly organized and practically guaranteed-to-be profitable corporate coaching company.

It was flattering, of course, as my years of expertise and effectiveness as a coach were what had this person want me for the position.

Obviously, I didn’t take the position. While I’m sure the coaching company will do great things and help many people, I had two questions for the CEO before even going down the path to considering this role:

1. Can I put the CLIENT first in my coaching, or would I have to put the company first?

2. Would I have to filter myself, or could I be fully me?

Without even a spoken word, it became a clear NO for both of us.

I’m sure I’ve lost position and profit, over and over, because SELF-TRUST must come first, both for me and for my clients.

#selfconnection and #selftrust are skills – they are learned and practiced. And most of the systems around you are teaching you the opposite – to bend to the will of giving away your power and sovereignty.

You know more than you think you do; you have the wisdom within. Cultivate those skills of #selfconnection and #selftrust.

Love,
💛 Allison

Podcast Episodes on Self Trust:

SELF-Trust & Invisible Systems

Coping Skills & Self-Trust

The post If You Can’t Lead Clients with SELF-TRUST What is the Real Agenda in Coaching? appeared first on Allison Crow.

An ADHD Update

Elyse Rich — Sun, 27 Aug 2023 14:59:35 +0000

Hello Human Podcast Listeners!

Today I want to share a little behind the scenes ADHD update.

This is kind of personal.

It’s a behind the scenes episodes of being a small business owner,
being a coaching practice owner who is also navigating the Wild Edges of Being Human.

Many of you know the diagnosis of my ADHD over 18 months ago
and the acclimation to that both education, identity, meds, the support I need has been way different journey then I would have ever imagined.

The diagnosis label is one thing and the aftermath is interesting.

This morning I woke up feeling more ME then I have in a long time.

Love,

Allison

Other ADHD Episodes and Posts:

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Resources:

Visit: Website: www.allisoncrow.com
Find out more about 1:1 coaching with Allison
Internal Family Systems Coaching and a brief IFS Model Overview
Get your copy of UNARMORED: Finding Home in the Wild Edge of Being Human

The post An ADHD Update appeared first on Allison Crow.