It’s not uncommon to feel a loss of confidence, especially during times of transition, change, or stress.

What we call “confidence” in the past was often rooted in external validation or 💛a sense of control over familiar circumstances. When life shifts—whether through age, relationships, career changes, or personal growth—it can feel like that foundation crumbles, leaving us questioning ourselves.

Here’s why this might be happening and some steps to start reconnecting with your confidence:

What Happened?

• External Confidence Was Shaken: Confidence often stems from skills, roles, or identities that feel secure. If those shift—like your job changing, kids leaving home, or your body aging—it’s natural to feel unsteady.
• Internal Growth Can Be Unsettling: Personal growth often brings self-awareness. You might notice patterns, like people-pleasing or perfectionism, that kept you going but were never sustainable. Letting go of those coping mechanisms can feel like losing your “edge.”
• Midlife Health or Neurodivergence May Amplify Self-Doubt: Shifts in hormones, energy, or brain patterns (like ADHD or Autism traits) can make you feel disconnected from the way you used to operate.
• Societal Pressure: There’s often pressure to “have it all figured out” at this stage of life. Feeling unsure can lead to self-doubt, especially if you compare yourself to others.

Here are some of the ways to rebuild self-confidence from the inside out in midlife:

• 💛True confidence comes from self-trust, not performing or pleasing. Begin to ask: What do I value What feels right for me now?
• 💛Practice honoring small inner nudges—this builds trust in yourself.
• 💛Lean Into Curiosity, Not Perfection: You don’t have to “get it all back.” Instead, ask: What feels intriguing, energizing, or joyful Confidence grows when you allow yourself to experiment and learn without harsh judgment.
• 💛Build Body Confidence Through Regulation: Confidence often starts in the body. Try grounding practices like walking, dancing, or slow breathing to bring calm and connection back into your physical self.
• 💛Tend to Self-Compassion: Talk to yourself the way you would a friend who’s lost their footing. Remind yourself that feeling uncertain is part of being human, not a sign of failure.
• 💛 Reconnect With Purpose: Ask: What feels meaningful What small actions can I take today to move toward that Confidence grows when we align our actions with what matters most.
• 💛 Limit Comparisons: Your path is unique. Comparing yourself to others is like comparing apples to oranges. Focus on your growth and values instead.

This stage of life isn’t about “getting back” to who you used to be—it’s about embracing the opportunity to become someone even more grounded, wise, and authentic. Confidence will come naturally as you build self-trust and honor your evolving self.

The post Midlife Can Cause Your Confidence to Wobble: Here’s Why and What to Do About It appeared first on Allison Crow.

Allison shares her personal journey of reinventing herself and her business,
discussing her struggles, coping mechanisms, and the need for genuine connections.

She emphasizes the importance of understanding one’s needs and cycles, challenging toxic individualism,
and finding what works authentically for oneself in business and life.

Key Topics and Timestamps

00:00 Welcome to the Live Session: Embracing Spring and Personal Insights

00:45 Journey Through Deep Self-Care and Spiritual Awakening

02:51 Understanding Coping Mechanisms and Embracing Humaness

04:34 The Transformation: From Personal Struggles to Spiritual Reintegration

07:57 Rebuilding Business and Personal Growth Amidst Challenges

12:02 Embracing Prosperity and Connection: A New Approach to Business

18:35 Breaking Free from Conventional Rules: Authentic Content Creation

20:39 Navigating the Achievement Phase: Letting Go of Old Paradigms

22:09 The One-to-Many Model and Its Limitations

23:54 Unlocking the Power of Personal Reinvention

24:37 Navigating Business with Personalized Strategies

26:20 Embracing Individuality in Business and Life

30:13 Challenging Societal Norms and Personal Development Myths

36:17 Understanding Variance and Supporting Personal Ebbs and Flows

42:14 Rebloom: Embracing Sovereignty and Spring Renewal

Mentioned In The Episode: 

The Post about Poker and Variation from my colleague, Mike Harris 

The Self-Lead Humans in Business Facebook Group 

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Resources:

• Visit: Website: www.allisoncrow.com
• Find out more about 1:1 coaching with Allison
• Internal Family Systems coaching and a brief IFS Model Overview
• Get your copy of UNARMORED: Finding Home in the Wild Edge of Being Human

The post Insights From Re-Blooming My Business appeared first on Allison Crow.

Hello Humans, another Road Riff Episode!

I use to consider myself an optimist. 

I still tend to have some of these qualities.

I tend to see the best in people.
I’m able to see the best in people.
Sometimes to my detriment.

My identity for many many years was built around making other people feel good.  

As I allow myself to be more human, as I drop the masks that I lived in to be save, I no longer claim to be an optimist.
Here’s why and what I claim to be instead

Love,

Allison

The ACA Bill of rights I mentioned in the episode

• Allisons ACA Bill of Rights Journal Pages

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 Resources:

• Visit: Website: www.allisoncrow.com
• Find out more about 1:1 coaching with Allison
• Internal Family Systems Coaching and a brief IFS Model Overview
• Get your copy of UNARMORED: Finding Home in the Wild Edge of Being Human

The post Why I’m No longer an Optimist And What I Am Instead appeared first on Allison Crow.

Emotions, ADHD & Motivation – A Convergence of Ideas

Hi Y’all!

I’ve been meaning to do an ADHD podcast for over a year and I saw this quote today by Tami Simon from Sounds True,

“Sometimes only the answer is found through living life.”

When I give myself the time and space to live life, the connections reveal themselves. And unmixing my internalized-for-51-years identity as it overlaps with ADHD has been a bit of a rumble for me lately. 

While not solely about ADHD, I have had some recent insights that really landed as I continue on my learning and practicing of IFS, some  deeper study of the Enneagram (because those dang test never tell me the same number). This episode is a grand convergence of ideas connecting emotions, ADHD, and motivation–seen from a deeper than usual lens. 

Love, 

Allison

• The Enneagram Insights I’ve gained have been from listening to Suzanne Stabile’s podcast, The Enneagram Journey, and reading her book The Path Between Us. 
• I’m also reading Sari Solden’s Book (the revised and expanded version) Women With Attention Deficit Disorder Embrace Your Differences and Transform Your Life 

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• Visit: Website: www.allisoncrow.com
• Find out more about 1:1 coaching with Allison
• Internal Family Systems Coaching and a brief IFS Model Overview
• Get your copy of UNARMORED: Finding Home in the Wild Edge of Being Human

The post Emotions, ADHD & Motivation – A Convergence of Ideas appeared first on Allison Crow.

Episode 204 Heather Doyle Frasier: The Practice of Compassionate Writing

Writer, Coach, Renaissance Woman, Lover of Books
Publisher of Compassionate Mind Collaborative and a singer. 

After having worked in the traditional publishing industry as a development editor,
Heather saw the humanity missing from the industry.

Meet my book coach, publisher, and friend. 

Writing is such a vulnerable raw experience.
Even when you feel like you have this covered something is going to come up during the process that is difficult and challenging. 

Merging her industry experience with coaching based in Compassionate Mind Training,
Heather creates a space and a loving mandate in her own publishing company.

Love, 

Allison

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Resources:

Heather’s Info:

Website Home:  https://www.cmcollab.com/

Offerings for writing and publishing  https://www.cmcollab.com/writing-your-book

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/compassionatewriter

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/cmcollaborative

Get a copy of UNARMORED: Finding Home in the Wild Edge of Being Human

The post Heather Doyle Frasier: The Practice of Compassionate Writing appeared first on Allison Crow.

Hello Humans, today we are jamming with fellow reinventor Cindy Ingram.

Cindy has a book coming out later in the year and today we are going to talk a little bit more about reinvention. 

Reinvention shows up on the outside but it’s usually because things happen on the inside. 

Originally choosing her work based on how it felt,
Cindy shows a certain level of self trust to choose those kind of things when we might think we need to do something different. 

“It has to feel right whatever I’m doing” – Cindy Ingram

And it takes a big leap to move careers with full on structural reinvention.

Love,

Allison

The post Cindy Ingram: Reinventing Your Business appeared first on Allison Crow.

Over the last 18 years, specifically coaching, I have worked with so many business owners.

Thousands and thousands of business owners everywhere from brand new business owners learning how to do things to business owners in achievement phase.

These days I tend to work with extremely experienced high revenue business owners. 
I also work with caring people.

I work with people who are heart-centered, who have passion, & who care.

Most of my clients might say, or at some point say, it’s not about the money.
Listen at one point I said it’s not about the money and I’ll never forget my close friend that said, “Oh yes it is.” 

Let me tell you why.

Love,

Allison

The post It’s not about the Money or is it A math message for heart-centered business owners. appeared first on Allison Crow.

You are brilliant, accomplished, able, and driven with a caring heart.  And sometimes your brain runs faster than your body. (Mine is doing that this morning).   Overthinking and anxiety happen when we are going so fast that the body gets left behind. I know you have tons on your plate, families to take care of, work to get done, clients to create, a dog to walk, and so much more. Slowing down doesn’t logically make sense to your thinking parts. AND IT IS WHAT WORKS. Give yourself the SELF Connection that opens the channel of flow – you know that flow; I’ve seen you in it. That space where you remember who you BE, and everything works from there. It’s as if magic starts to happen. Your thinking parts forget this. So we have to choose to create connection and attunement to our own core SELF. Do this first.

Listen to the Latest Podcast Episodes:  197: Reinvention:  Tools for the Pivot & Success 198: Checking in and Updates – What to Expect  194: Beautiful & Miserable – Life is Not the Container Store     PS: Thanks for helping me make my new book Unarmored: Finding Home in the Wild Edges of Being Human a best seller in 5 categories! I LOVE seeing the actual book in your hands and being tagged on Socials! Thank you!

The post Flow Missing Do this First – It Works Every Time appeared first on Allison Crow.

Welcome!

Recently I made a giant decision in my business AND I’ve been known to make giant decisions.
The last time was in 2011 and the time before that was in 2009.

I do remember the last two times and I remember the emotional difficulty of the last two times.

No, I’m not freaking out and the reason I’m not freaking out,

I know how to manage my scared parts so much better than the last time I made a big decision like this,
I live below my means

AND

I can do this because I have the skills.

Love,

Allison

The post Reinvention: Tools for the Pivot & Success appeared first on Allison Crow.

Roy Kent and Oscar the Grouch are my idols. Totally irritated. Totally pure.

 

@sesamestreet For a second there we thought Oscar had met his match! #BrettGoldstein #OscartheGrouch #SesameStreet ♬ original sound – sesamestreet

The post Roy Fucking Kent and Oscar the Grouch – My Muses appeared first on Allison Crow.