It’s not uncommon to feel a loss of confidence, especially during times of transition, change, or stress.

What we call “confidence” in the past was often rooted in external validation or 💛a sense of control over familiar circumstances. When life shifts—whether through age, relationships, career changes, or personal growth—it can feel like that foundation crumbles, leaving us questioning ourselves.

Here’s why this might be happening and some steps to start reconnecting with your confidence:

What Happened?

• External Confidence Was Shaken: Confidence often stems from skills, roles, or identities that feel secure. If those shift—like your job changing, kids leaving home, or your body aging—it’s natural to feel unsteady.
• Internal Growth Can Be Unsettling: Personal growth often brings self-awareness. You might notice patterns, like people-pleasing or perfectionism, that kept you going but were never sustainable. Letting go of those coping mechanisms can feel like losing your “edge.”
• Midlife Health or Neurodivergence May Amplify Self-Doubt: Shifts in hormones, energy, or brain patterns (like ADHD or Autism traits) can make you feel disconnected from the way you used to operate.
• Societal Pressure: There’s often pressure to “have it all figured out” at this stage of life. Feeling unsure can lead to self-doubt, especially if you compare yourself to others.

Here are some of the ways to rebuild self-confidence from the inside out in midlife:

• 💛True confidence comes from self-trust, not performing or pleasing. Begin to ask: What do I value What feels right for me now?
• 💛Practice honoring small inner nudges—this builds trust in yourself.
• 💛Lean Into Curiosity, Not Perfection: You don’t have to “get it all back.” Instead, ask: What feels intriguing, energizing, or joyful Confidence grows when you allow yourself to experiment and learn without harsh judgment.
• 💛Build Body Confidence Through Regulation: Confidence often starts in the body. Try grounding practices like walking, dancing, or slow breathing to bring calm and connection back into your physical self.
• 💛Tend to Self-Compassion: Talk to yourself the way you would a friend who’s lost their footing. Remind yourself that feeling uncertain is part of being human, not a sign of failure.
• 💛 Reconnect With Purpose: Ask: What feels meaningful What small actions can I take today to move toward that Confidence grows when we align our actions with what matters most.
• 💛 Limit Comparisons: Your path is unique. Comparing yourself to others is like comparing apples to oranges. Focus on your growth and values instead.

This stage of life isn’t about “getting back” to who you used to be—it’s about embracing the opportunity to become someone even more grounded, wise, and authentic. Confidence will come naturally as you build self-trust and honor your evolving self.

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Here’s a short riff on #habits, #identity, #productivity, #becoming #ambition, #coaching and why I am absolutely tracking 3 personal and 3 professional habits this year. I’d love to hear your take on what works for you What do you resist What would truly benefit you if you were lovingly honest with yourself?
#success #mindset #leadership #inspiration

The post Overcoming productivity/accountability trauma and why I’m embracing tracking habits in 2021. appeared first on Allison Crow.

Hi Loves,

As we approach the new year, I’m sending you love, and deep self-trust.

Visiting with my Soulie clients this week, we were all laughing about how much pressure we make up and put on ourselves because the calendar year changes.   It’s just a day. 

I love ceremony, and ritual, and new beginnings,  but not at the expense of shame and pressure.  Ah, the subtle shame of self-development.  And while I like to think I don’t get all monkey mind about this stuff, this year I did for a few days. 

My coach asked me a profound question last week when I was fretting about how much screen time I was spending and how I was rotting my brain on social media.  

“Allison, what if you didn’t judge yourself What if nothing else changed and you simply stopped judging yourself.”

I would totally enjoy being on social media and I would be so grateful for the community, clients, and connection I’ve made in the 10 years I’ve been on social!  I would be free to feel joy!

Wow… not judging my goal, my circumstance…my progress, my success or failure….LIBERATING!

• Today I am remembering that I am enough and am reminding you that you are too.
• Today I am remembering that in 2018 I did way more than enough….and so did you. 
• Today I am remembering that there is no pressure to make any resolution or set any goal that is not truly my own…and I’m giving you permission to do the same. 
• Today I am loving what is and releasing any stories or judgment that steal my joy!

I just wanted to pop in your sacred inbox and share some of this goodness with you.  Thank you for reading. 

Love, and Happy Day Every Day, 

Your favorite life coach, Allison 

PS:  I’d love to invite you to become a Soulie!  That is a member of my Coaching Membership Community called SoulFull Success.  Right now the monthly fee is only 188/mo. (the price goes up Jan 15- so get in now if you are on the fence) Yes, that is for LIVE coaching and training with me and the other powerful members of our group.   You can find out more at https://soulfullsuccess.live/purchase-life/

PSS: If you are planning on coming to Camp Start Heart 2019 May 1-4 in ATX, you might want to save 334$ now by getting your ticket early! There are 13 tickets left!  Here are the deets:  /camp-star-heart-2019/

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It is fascinating how the path of judgment and good enough and how the path of the comparing mind seduce us. We are deeply and subconscious compelled to box ourselves in.
.
And.
There is a space beyond the thinking mind, beyond the labels and judgments and made up stories where something more true resides…..
#slowdown #tunein & #followthepathwithheart

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Ahhh the life of an entrepreneur!  Do you sometimes feel both free and trapped at the same time Especially if you have been in business for a while.  The exhilaration of possibility may have traded itself for overwhelm.  Neuroscientists at Princeton have already determined that physical clutter competes for your attention and causes decreased performance and increased stress.

Anything that competes for your attention can be clutter. Sometimes we call it noise.  In this electronic age – our digital stimulation is off the charts.  Add that on to all of the elements of your business, taking care of your clients and customers, and it’s no wonder we consider throwing in the towel or …even getting a menial job with a boss and a scheduled paycheck.

It’s time to Marie Kondo that shit.   Marie Kondo is the author of The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up.  One of the premises is to get rid of anything that doesn’t give you joy – and that is needlessly taking up space.  

Most of my audience are heart centered entrepreneurs – people who have a high need for integrity and alignment in their work.  Often emotion wins out over strategy on a day to day business.  I get it.  This is my m.o., too…  and we have to check ourselves regularly.

In 2015 Jonathan Fields wrote a blog post called  Why Do So Many Entrepreneurs Hate Their Lives and in it, he suggests 11 questions for realigning your actions with your essence. These 11 questions are a good start to getting clear on what you want to keep in your work, and what is time to toss.  

Whether you are just getting started, and especially if you have been in business for a while…these 11 questions combined with deciding what truly gives YOU Joy…can help you realign, and reinvigorate your work.  A clean sweep if you will.  

Other resources mentioned in the show:  

http://www.jonathanfields.com/entrepreneurs-hate-lives/  Why Do So Many Entrepreneurs Hate Their Lives

Marie Kondo: author of The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up http://tidyingup.com/  

Videocast:

Podcast:

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