Allison Crow

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When resistance convinces you – you have nothing of value to say: What is the value is…. a message from the queen of Share Your Heart Show Your Work

November 19, 2018

When resistance convinces you – you have nothing of value to say: What is the value is…. a message from the queen of Share Your Heart Show Your Work

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by allisoncrow 

About allisoncrow

Advanced Personal Development Life Coach for Experienced Business Owners & ExecsπŸ’›Author, Art, & Dogs

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Comments

  1. Michelle Bastian says: November 19, 2018 at 9:58 pm

    Ooh loved her!

  2. Debbie Hearn Shannon says: November 19, 2018 at 10:00 pm

    Feelin’ the love!

  3. Gayle Zientek says: November 19, 2018 at 10:00 pm

    enjoy the book!

  4. Debbie Hearn Shannon says: November 19, 2018 at 10:04 pm

    I have this same thought habit…..if it’s not life changing it’s not worth sharing.

  5. Christina Lord says: November 19, 2018 at 10:04 pm

    Cheers ?

  6. Christina Lord says: November 19, 2018 at 10:04 pm

    I’m thinking the same thing!!!!?

  7. Christina Lord says: November 19, 2018 at 10:04 pm

    I’m thinking the same thing!!!!

  8. Laura Adkerson Larcom says: November 19, 2018 at 10:04 pm

    Love emotion code!

  9. Rhonda Hampton Schienle says: November 19, 2018 at 10:06 pm

    Reah Lemini ?

  10. Shannon Peebles says: November 19, 2018 at 10:08 pm

    8 or 9 for third grade

  11. Rhonda Hampton Schienle says: November 19, 2018 at 10:08 pm

    Yes!!! ?✨?

  12. Laura Duffield says: November 19, 2018 at 10:10 pm

    ??

  13. Michelle Bastian says: November 19, 2018 at 10:13 pm

    Just the word community sparks hope and brings a smile to my face.

  14. Stacy Petrossian says: November 19, 2018 at 10:14 pm

    I work better in the office. i crave connection

  15. Shannon Peebles says: November 19, 2018 at 10:14 pm

    I’ve never worked in an office, but I think about it from time to time – whether it would suit me better.

  16. Stacy Petrossian says: November 19, 2018 at 10:15 pm

    Yes!!!! Come to Los Angeles you can stay with me!!!!

  17. Christy Chick Nash says: November 19, 2018 at 10:15 pm

    Thank you for this connecting call. Loving us all!

  18. Laura Adkerson Larcom says: November 19, 2018 at 10:16 pm

    I keep my queen card next to my bed!!!

  19. Michelle Bastian says: November 19, 2018 at 10:16 pm

    Sometimes I need the physical hug that can’t be done online

  20. Laura Adkerson Larcom says: November 19, 2018 at 10:17 pm

    Of course!!!!

  21. Michelle Bastian says: November 19, 2018 at 10:17 pm

    Hosting scares the shit out of me!

  22. Wendy Johnson Burge says: November 19, 2018 at 10:20 pm

    ? yes absolutely.

  23. Wendy Johnson Burge says: November 19, 2018 at 10:20 pm

    yes absolutely.

  24. Debbie Hearn Shannon says: November 19, 2018 at 10:20 pm

    Yep – connection is key

  25. Michelle Bastian says: November 19, 2018 at 10:24 pm

    ?‍♀️

  26. Tesa Golden says: November 19, 2018 at 10:24 pm

    [Hand up!]

  27. Vanessa Kinsey says: November 19, 2018 at 10:29 pm

    Hi Allison. Great topic!

  28. Shannon Peebles says: November 19, 2018 at 10:29 pm

    Mostly epigentics right now, but she’s open to tailoring things as needed.

  29. Michelle Bastian says: November 19, 2018 at 10:31 pm

    Thank you. Just had a major ah ha moment.

    • Allison Crow says: November 19, 2018 at 10:40 pm

      Id love to hear your ah-ha!

    • Michelle Bastian says: November 19, 2018 at 11:05 pm

      I have a block and couldn’t pin point exactly what it was. Asking for help creates shame for me. Being told growing up that I β€œshould” be able to do it on my own or to stop crying because things aren’t that bad. So I wouldn’t ask for help or I would stuff the emotions. This also includes depression and anxiety. Being told by β€œchurch” people that God could heal me and I didn’t need medication to be healed, I just needed to believe and it would go away. These blocks have been HUGE for me this year and also blocking me from making connections with people.

      I have put the wedge between myself and others because of that shame. Thinking that I just needed to suck it up and deal with things. And not understanding why this last surgery seemed to really have an affect on my mental health. As soon as the depression and anxiety started to surface it made reaching out much more difficult because of the layer of shame. And that then brought up triggers from when I was a teenager and felt the most out of control!

      The other Ah Ha! moment for me is when you said if you don’t have a community, create one! I know Tiffany said this as well today, but maybe hearing it again from you got my mind going of what I could do. And I even wrote down ideas of things to, dare I say, host! I have always wanted people to come to my house and hang out and have also been scared to have people at my house. It’s a tug of war that I have. My mind wants to retreat and my heart desires to reach out.

      So, I will post it here and make it true, cause if it’s on FB it makes it true. I am going to set up an event at my house. Either a cookie swap, a dessert buffet, a coffee/cocoa bar, a wine/cheese/chocolate night, a white elephant gift exchange, something with other people and in my house!!! And I will make a post about the event on my personal page this week. I need to reach out to receive!

    • Allison Crow says: November 19, 2018 at 11:13 pm

      Michelle Bastian beautiful insight and inspiring ideas to move forward on. ?

    • Allison Crow says: November 19, 2018 at 11:13 pm

      Michelle Bastian beautiful insight and inspiring ideas to move forward on.

  30. Wendy Johnson Burge says: November 19, 2018 at 10:31 pm

    You are epic!! Love this message!

    • Allison Crow says: November 20, 2018 at 12:06 pm

      Wendy Johnson Burge thank you ?

    • Allison Crow says: November 20, 2018 at 12:06 pm

      Wendy Johnson Burge thank you

  31. Shannon Peebles says: November 19, 2018 at 10:31 pm

    Peaceful heart

  32. Christina Lord says: November 19, 2018 at 10:34 pm

    Curiosity

  33. Christina Lord says: November 19, 2018 at 10:35 pm

    Ok sounds good!!

  34. Christina Lord says: November 19, 2018 at 10:39 pm

    ???

    • Allison Crow says: November 20, 2018 at 12:06 pm

      Christina Lord ?

  35. Anna Bingamon says: November 19, 2018 at 10:39 pm

    Thank you ?

    • Allison Crow says: November 20, 2018 at 12:05 pm

      Anna Bingamon my pleasure.

  36. Liz Gilmour says: November 19, 2018 at 10:39 pm

    ?

    • Allison Crow says: November 19, 2018 at 10:40 pm

      hi! I missed your wave live!

  37. Allison Crow says: November 19, 2018 at 10:50 pm

    This 80’s hair is killin me, Smalls.

  38. Jody Caunter Garcia says: November 19, 2018 at 11:14 pm

    Yas! I loved the queen circle!

    • Allison Crow says: November 20, 2018 at 12:05 pm

      Jody Caunter Garcia me too. ??

    • Allison Crow says: November 20, 2018 at 12:05 pm

      Jody Caunter Garcia me too.

  39. Jody Caunter Garcia says: November 19, 2018 at 11:15 pm

    I’ll even host your local thing if you want!

  40. Jody Caunter Garcia says: November 19, 2018 at 11:27 pm

    I think I want to get trained in the body code. My interest is piqued!

    • Allison Crow says: November 20, 2018 at 12:05 pm

      Jody Caunter Garcia isn’t it fascinating. The things that came up were spot on.

  41. Jayne Daly says: November 20, 2018 at 5:54 am

    Love your HAIR

    • Allison Crow says: November 20, 2018 at 12:04 pm

      Jayne Daly thank you. ?

    • Allison Crow says: November 20, 2018 at 12:04 pm

      Jayne Daly thank you.

  42. Darlene Versak says: November 20, 2018 at 1:09 pm

    Hi replay and thank you gorgeous!

  43. Darlene Versak says: November 20, 2018 at 1:18 pm

    I had white blonde hair as a little girl too❀

  44. Darlene Versak says: November 20, 2018 at 1:18 pm

    I had white blonde hair as a little girl too

  45. Darlene Versak says: November 20, 2018 at 1:22 pm

    Love this…and you had nothing to say, lol

    • Allison Crow says: November 23, 2018 at 4:11 pm

      Darlene Versak right?! Some times we just need to start to get clarity.

  46. Darlene Versak says: November 20, 2018 at 1:26 pm

    Oooh when are you in New York?

    • Allison Crow says: November 20, 2018 at 2:27 pm

      Darlene Versak nov 30- dec 3. I think I’m gonna do a meet up the evening of the 2nd at my hotel.

    • Darlene Versak says: November 20, 2018 at 3:06 pm

      Allison Crow I would love to come see you on 12/2 and hug you in person ?

    • Darlene Versak says: November 20, 2018 at 3:06 pm

      Allison Crow I would love to come see you on 12/2 and hug you in person

    • Allison Crow says: November 20, 2018 at 3:34 pm

      Darlene Versak I would love that too.

  47. Tressa Brandenburg Ellis says: November 22, 2018 at 4:45 am

    Everything has to be created twice…once in our imagination and then physically.

    • Allison Crow says: November 23, 2018 at 4:11 pm

      Tressa Brandenburg Ellis yes it does!

  48. Allison Crow says: November 19, 2019 at 4:24 pm

    How did I have this awesome hair!!

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𝐄𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐒𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐧 𝐄𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐒𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐛π₯𝐞𝐦𝐬 𝐭𝐨 π›πž 𝐟𝐒𝐱𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐫 πšπ―π¨π’ππžπβ€”they’re messages from different parts of you. Rather than labeling them as good or bad, approach them with curiosity. Each emotion is a part of your system trying to communicate something important about your needs. By listening with empathy to these parts, you deepen your understanding of yourself and build emotional intelligence. This practice of compassionate inquiry helps you strengthen your connection to your internal experience and empowers you to respond in a way that aligns with your true Self.
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Overthink Much? I have this mental ideal that is Overthink Much?

I have this mental ideal that is embedded in my brain that I would be able to wake up and move forward with all my intentions.  I can see the clear direction and simple steps. I can envision all the "results" and the relief I make up those results would bring. 

One of the things I'm teaching myself to do - is try to write more from a professional voice for you instead of blab in inner processing out on this little white pop-up box. 

How's that working, Alli?

Buahahahah.... all my sweet and striving little parts trying to hold my life closely to that ideal.  I sense the squirm of these parts in my body even when my "thinking" is clear.

I now know this to be a signal for me to slow down and meet those parts with calm and curiosity. First, I must get past one of my sneakiest and most powerful partsβ€”my "awareness" part. This is not Awareness from my core self. 
In IFS - we call these self-like parts. The distinction is that the awareness part carries the burden and tone of "You're doing it wrong."

I asked my clients to notice the part of them that is "mindful and self-aware." What are the words that the voice uses? What is its tone? 

Is it SELF-calm and compassionate, deeply connected? Or is it cognitive and managerial with a motive? 

OOOOF...sending sweet love and compassion to all my thinking, overthinking, and trying-to-get-it-right-for-some-imaginaryideal-parts, and to yours. 

These parts need our somatic connection and attunement. They do not need judgment and alienation. They are scared and holding ages of fear and pain. 

Hello, inner managers, and judgers, and thinkers.  I see you.  I am here for you.  I see your skills.  You have done nothing wrong.  No matter what you feel, you deserve more love, not less.  Let's just breathe together, and then you can share your fears and concerns.  I am here for you.  I will not leave you.
This sweet girl. Only a few taco Tuesday’s left This sweet girl. Only a few taco Tuesday’s left before they move across the state.
In the IFS community, we call triggers "trailheads In the IFS community, we call triggers "trailheads" or say, "This part of me is really activated." Identifying and caring for emotionally reactive parts gives us the opportunity to respond with intention rather than impulsively. By practicing emotional regulation and internal partswork, you can create space between stimulus and response, allowing for more thoughtful and grounded decision-making.
Instagram post 18052656569149431 Instagram post 18052656569149431
For me, it was the fear I would disintegrate and b For me, it was the fear I would disintegrate and be insignificant.  For many, it's attached to conditional love.  IFS coaching helped me in places typical coaching couldn't.  It helped me compassionately understand and connect with these parts - and ya know what? They began to relax, build trust, and step back, leaving space for my natural creativity, grounded confidence, and clarity to lead in my work & life.  This is available to you.  #ifscoaching
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