Allison Crow

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137: What if You Fully Trusted Yourself? [VIDEO EPISODE]

April 19, 2021

Better Life Better Work 2.0:
What happens when you declare your values –The Better Life Better Work Show Is Back.
What Happened
Where We Are
And Where We are Going.

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by allisoncrow 

About allisoncrow

Advanced Personal Development Life Coach for Experienced Business Owners & Execs๐Ÿ’›Author, Art, & Dogs

View all posts by allisoncrow

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previous article: Taking Space
next article: One Thing Smart People Forget to Do

Comments

  1. Brandie Wilks says: April 19, 2021 at 2:46 pm

    Hi Allison! So glad to catch you this morning

    • Allison Crow says: April 19, 2021 at 3:25 pm

      Brandie Wilks So glad to have you!

  2. Debbie Shannon says: April 19, 2021 at 2:47 pm

    Whatโ€™s up AC?!

    • Allison Crow says: April 19, 2021 at 3:25 pm

      Debbie Shannon Hey there! Love seeing you!

  3. Brandie Wilks says: April 19, 2021 at 2:59 pm

    It happens when it happens – I love you

    • Allison Crow says: April 19, 2021 at 3:25 pm

      Brandie Wilks Everything is always in the just right time!

  4. DeAnne Pearson says: April 19, 2021 at 2:59 pm

    Love you right where you, how you are! I appreciate you showing up in with your cup of coffee and a whole heaping serving of authentic you.

    • Allison Crow says: April 19, 2021 at 3:25 pm

      DeAnne Pearson Thank you!

  5. Jody Caunter Garcia says: April 19, 2021 at 3:00 pm

    omg – Dr. Allison!

    • Allison Crow says: April 19, 2021 at 3:26 pm

      Jody Caunter Garcia Only my ego really wants that! If I validate myself I don’t need that Dr. thing.

      • Allison Crow says: April 19, 2021 at 3:26 pm

        Jody Caunter Garcia and I am so impressed by my PHD friends!

  6. Mary Dixon says: April 19, 2021 at 3:44 pm

    Influencers..arrgghh.

    • Allison Crow says: April 19, 2021 at 3:48 pm

      Mary Dixon Like for real? WTF is that

      • Mary Dixon says: April 19, 2021 at 3:50 pm

        It’s some weird aspect of celebrity culture I think.

    • Allison Crow says: April 19, 2021 at 5:35 pm

      Mary Dixon totally

  7. Mary Dixon says: April 19, 2021 at 3:54 pm

    Oh I have had a taste of IFS… very good, as well as somatic experiencing.

    • Allison Crow says: April 19, 2021 at 5:35 pm

      Mary Dixon somatic experience is amazing. Iโ€™ve come across a few IFS somatic practitioners recently.

  8. Mary Dixon says: April 19, 2021 at 3:56 pm

    Oh I feel you in that..fitting the mold. I still don’t have a clue what I am doing or want to do….I think I have been warped in my ability to even choose. And I should be “retiring” by now…

    • Laura Long says: April 19, 2021 at 7:50 pm

      Mary Dixon I hear you on the should of retirement, but really for me, it’s that I need to do it my way. And, like Allison it’s an evolution…that’s all.

  9. Sherri A Nicholas says: April 19, 2021 at 4:02 pm

    Your authenticity always shines no matter what you say …. just saying …. coaches that know what they can fit into mouth are better than the ones that eat and sell all you can eat ….. youโ€™re definitely inspiring

    • Allison Crow says: April 19, 2021 at 5:34 pm

      Sherri A Nicholas thank you.

  10. Moira Shaughnessy says: April 19, 2021 at 4:19 pm

    So effing inspiring. Thank you, Allison Crow.

    • Allison Crow says: April 19, 2021 at 5:34 pm

      Moira Shaughnessy always happy to inspire.

  11. Jackie Hall Gates says: April 19, 2021 at 4:20 pm

    Wow….this is so good. I don’t have a business, but I do desire deep inner work.

    • Allison Crow says: April 19, 2021 at 5:32 pm

      Jackie Hall Gates we do it every week on life coaching calls in the membership! You are welcome any tome if it feels aligned with you.

  12. Kristen Roedner says: April 19, 2021 at 4:36 pm

    Hi

  13. Laura Long says: April 19, 2021 at 7:56 pm

    The evolution of the creative mind is a delight in the consistent message you offer of …do you. You have an amazing evolution of life, and from this side you have been the guide to do it my way. Big heart hugs for your beautiful soul, with cute curls

  14. Jennifer Koerner says: April 19, 2021 at 10:09 pm

    I you so much.

  15. Fiona Mack says: April 19, 2021 at 11:35 pm

    Welcome back! Love you lots!

  16. Jennifer Koerner says: April 20, 2021 at 12:46 am

    I’m honored to know you.

  17. Jennifer Koerner says: April 20, 2021 at 12:47 am

    I love IFS.

  18. Sue Revell says: April 20, 2021 at 7:26 am

    So glad I heard this today! We are dancing SUCH a similar dance right now and it was beautiful to hear my experience in your words. In fact, the most beautiful words were the words Iโ€™m using too!
    Saving this one. Love you xx

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๐Ÿ’› Finding Home in the Wild Edges of Being Human

๐„๐ฆ๐จ๐ญ๐ข๐จ๐ง๐ฌ ๐š๐ซ๐ž ๐ง ๐„๐ฆ๐จ๐ญ๐ข๐จ๐ง๐ฌ ๐š๐ซ๐ž ๐ง๐จ๐ญ ๐ฉ๐ซ๐จ๐›๐ฅ๐ž๐ฆ๐ฌ ๐ญ๐จ ๐›๐ž ๐Ÿ๐ข๐ฑ๐ž๐ ๐จ๐ซ ๐š๐ฏ๐จ๐ข๐๐ž๐โ€”theyโ€™re messages from different parts of you. Rather than labeling them as good or bad, approach them with curiosity. Each emotion is a part of your system trying to communicate something important about your needs. By listening with empathy to these parts, you deepen your understanding of yourself and build emotional intelligence. This practice of compassionate inquiry helps you strengthen your connection to your internal experience and empowers you to respond in a way that aligns with your true Self.
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Overthink Much? I have this mental ideal that is Overthink Much?

I have this mental ideal that is embedded in my brain that I would be able to wake up and move forward with all my intentions.  I can see the clear direction and simple steps. I can envision all the "results" and the relief I make up those results would bring. 

One of the things I'm teaching myself to do - is try to write more from a professional voice for you instead of blab in inner processing out on this little white pop-up box. 

How's that working, Alli?

Buahahahah.... all my sweet and striving little parts trying to hold my life closely to that ideal.  I sense the squirm of these parts in my body even when my "thinking" is clear.

I now know this to be a signal for me to slow down and meet those parts with calm and curiosity. First, I must get past one of my sneakiest and most powerful partsโ€”my "awareness" part. This is not Awareness from my core self. 
In IFS - we call these self-like parts. The distinction is that the awareness part carries the burden and tone of "You're doing it wrong."

I asked my clients to notice the part of them that is "mindful and self-aware." What are the words that the voice uses? What is its tone? 

Is it SELF-calm and compassionate, deeply connected? Or is it cognitive and managerial with a motive? 

OOOOF...sending sweet love and compassion to all my thinking, overthinking, and trying-to-get-it-right-for-some-imaginaryideal-parts, and to yours. 

These parts need our somatic connection and attunement. They do not need judgment and alienation. They are scared and holding ages of fear and pain. 

Hello, inner managers, and judgers, and thinkers.  I see you.  I am here for you.  I see your skills.  You have done nothing wrong.  No matter what you feel, you deserve more love, not less.  Let's just breathe together, and then you can share your fears and concerns.  I am here for you.  I will not leave you.
This sweet girl. Only a few taco Tuesdayโ€™s left This sweet girl. Only a few taco Tuesdayโ€™s left before they move across the state.
In the IFS community, we call triggers "trailheads In the IFS community, we call triggers "trailheads" or say, "This part of me is really activated." Identifying and caring for emotionally reactive parts gives us the opportunity to respond with intention rather than impulsively. By practicing emotional regulation and internal partswork, you can create space between stimulus and response, allowing for more thoughtful and grounded decision-making.
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For me, it was the fear I would disintegrate and b For me, it was the fear I would disintegrate and be insignificant.  For many, it's attached to conditional love.  IFS coaching helped me in places typical coaching couldn't.  It helped me compassionately understand and connect with these parts - and ya know what? They began to relax, build trust, and step back, leaving space for my natural creativity, grounded confidence, and clarity to lead in my work & life.  This is available to you.  #ifscoaching
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