Allison Crow

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Achievement and Success, Alignment, Anxiety, Authentic Leadership, Better Life Better Work Show, Coaching, Conversations, Emotions, Leadership, Life, Life Coaching, Mindset and Thinking, Personal Growth, Podcast, Purpose, Self Leadership

Self-Leadership & Wholehearted Living

August 1, 2021

At the beginning of the year I hired a coach to work on self leadership and self trust and a whole new deepening of who I be is being cultivated. 

I love a good reset! Like when my Amazon fire stick stops working I just reset it or my computer starts going slow I just reboot it.

I am in a new phase of cultivating my meaningful work.

Any time we go through an expansion and evolution I think it’s normal for scarcity and doubt to flare up. I am so grateful for the flareups. I don’t bowl over them, I meet them with tenderness. There is opportunity with whole body healing and embodiment of that which we are cultivating. 

The embodiment piece – taking these things that I cultivate into my whole body. 

I’m moving closer to myself in a calm and curious way. 

Meeting the tenderness & listening.

Fear, comparison, anxiety & perfectionism are NOT moral failures. 

Instead of jumping over these tender parts and forcing myself into creativity and self trust, I notice I am embodying self trust by meeting those tender parts of myself. 

They say what you focus on expands. I call bullshit on that. What you ignore expands. 

When we jump over the difficult parts we end up at the same place over and over and that’s not a moral failure either. 

If you’re feeling wobbly slow down and check in below your head and check in with your own heart. 

What if you just sat and listened to your fears and listen does not mean believe? 

What if you really heard the parts of you that get into what people think, perfection, numbing, powerlessness, scarcity, fear, the need for certainty, exhaustion, comparison, production overdoing, over hustling, over performing, anxiety as a lifestyle, self doubt, shoulding all over yourself and being cool & always control? 

What if … I don’t want to let go.. I want to listen & nurture.. that’s how I cultivate. What if these aren’t negative emotions?
What if they are seed opportunities to cultivate something? 

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Reference Links:

Brene Brown
https://brenebrown.com/
https://brenebrown.com/wholehearted-inventory/

Allison Crow
Painting retreat – 2 spots left.
https://allisoncrow.com/wild-and-free-expressive-arts-retreat-with-allison/
Soulies  
https://soulfullsuccess.live/purchase-life/

Video Episodes
https://www.facebook.com/allisoncrow/videos/356179269448343
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8MfjXYscASY

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πŸ’› Finding Home in the Wild Edges of Being Human

𝐄𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐒𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐧 𝐄𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐒𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐛π₯𝐞𝐦𝐬 𝐭𝐨 π›πž 𝐟𝐒𝐱𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐫 πšπ―π¨π’ππžπβ€”they’re messages from different parts of you. Rather than labeling them as good or bad, approach them with curiosity. Each emotion is a part of your system trying to communicate something important about your needs. By listening with empathy to these parts, you deepen your understanding of yourself and build emotional intelligence. This practice of compassionate inquiry helps you strengthen your connection to your internal experience and empowers you to respond in a way that aligns with your true Self.
Instagram post 18053763071158914 Instagram post 18053763071158914
Overthink Much? I have this mental ideal that is Overthink Much?

I have this mental ideal that is embedded in my brain that I would be able to wake up and move forward with all my intentions.  I can see the clear direction and simple steps. I can envision all the "results" and the relief I make up those results would bring. 

One of the things I'm teaching myself to do - is try to write more from a professional voice for you instead of blab in inner processing out on this little white pop-up box. 

How's that working, Alli?

Buahahahah.... all my sweet and striving little parts trying to hold my life closely to that ideal.  I sense the squirm of these parts in my body even when my "thinking" is clear.

I now know this to be a signal for me to slow down and meet those parts with calm and curiosity. First, I must get past one of my sneakiest and most powerful partsβ€”my "awareness" part. This is not Awareness from my core self. 
In IFS - we call these self-like parts. The distinction is that the awareness part carries the burden and tone of "You're doing it wrong."

I asked my clients to notice the part of them that is "mindful and self-aware." What are the words that the voice uses? What is its tone? 

Is it SELF-calm and compassionate, deeply connected? Or is it cognitive and managerial with a motive? 

OOOOF...sending sweet love and compassion to all my thinking, overthinking, and trying-to-get-it-right-for-some-imaginaryideal-parts, and to yours. 

These parts need our somatic connection and attunement. They do not need judgment and alienation. They are scared and holding ages of fear and pain. 

Hello, inner managers, and judgers, and thinkers.  I see you.  I am here for you.  I see your skills.  You have done nothing wrong.  No matter what you feel, you deserve more love, not less.  Let's just breathe together, and then you can share your fears and concerns.  I am here for you.  I will not leave you.
This sweet girl. Only a few taco Tuesday’s left This sweet girl. Only a few taco Tuesday’s left before they move across the state.
In the IFS community, we call triggers "trailheads In the IFS community, we call triggers "trailheads" or say, "This part of me is really activated." Identifying and caring for emotionally reactive parts gives us the opportunity to respond with intention rather than impulsively. By practicing emotional regulation and internal partswork, you can create space between stimulus and response, allowing for more thoughtful and grounded decision-making.
Instagram post 18052656569149431 Instagram post 18052656569149431
For me, it was the fear I would disintegrate and b For me, it was the fear I would disintegrate and be insignificant.  For many, it's attached to conditional love.  IFS coaching helped me in places typical coaching couldn't.  It helped me compassionately understand and connect with these parts - and ya know what? They began to relax, build trust, and step back, leaving space for my natural creativity, grounded confidence, and clarity to lead in my work & life.  This is available to you.  #ifscoaching
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