Allison Crow

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Achievement and Success, Authentic Leadership, Better Life Better Work Show, Coaching, Conversations, Mindset and Thinking, Personal, Personal Growth, Podcast, Soul-Full Success

Permission to Do & BE Different in 2021

December 27, 2020

Letโ€™s slow down for a moment together. 

As we come to the end of the year, I know many of us are racing to see 2020 end. 

I understand why we are doing this, but I want to also encourage you to pause for a moment and reflect. 

The truth is, January 1st can mean something big for us, or it doesnโ€™t have to mean anything. 

We donโ€™t know what may change in 2021. 

We canโ€™t control most of it. 

We can, however, control how we slow down, what we give our attention to and think about, and who we want to be. 

Now is a great time to reflect on this year and who you want to BE in 2021. 

Iโ€™m even making it easier for you by giving you the 3 questions Iโ€™m reflecting on these days (including my fave leadership question!) on the podcast this week. 

Tune into this last episode of 2020 to give yourself the time to reflect (plus Iโ€™m dropping some big news about the show moving forward that you wonโ€™t want to miss) and if it feels right, share what pops up for you with me on Instagram or Facebook. 

See you in 2021. 

Love, 

As always, 

Authentic & Ambitious, 

Allison Crow

PS – If you didnโ€™t hear, I opened the doors to Soul-Full Success (my coaching community) yesterday! If you want me to be your coach and want to be part of a community of other ambition and authentic humans, join us at https://soulfullsuccess.live/purchase-life/

 

Referenced in Podcast:
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๐Ÿ’› Finding Home in the Wild Edges of Being Human

๐„๐ฆ๐จ๐ญ๐ข๐จ๐ง๐ฌ ๐š๐ซ๐ž ๐ง ๐„๐ฆ๐จ๐ญ๐ข๐จ๐ง๐ฌ ๐š๐ซ๐ž ๐ง๐จ๐ญ ๐ฉ๐ซ๐จ๐›๐ฅ๐ž๐ฆ๐ฌ ๐ญ๐จ ๐›๐ž ๐Ÿ๐ข๐ฑ๐ž๐ ๐จ๐ซ ๐š๐ฏ๐จ๐ข๐๐ž๐โ€”theyโ€™re messages from different parts of you. Rather than labeling them as good or bad, approach them with curiosity. Each emotion is a part of your system trying to communicate something important about your needs. By listening with empathy to these parts, you deepen your understanding of yourself and build emotional intelligence. This practice of compassionate inquiry helps you strengthen your connection to your internal experience and empowers you to respond in a way that aligns with your true Self.
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Overthink Much? I have this mental ideal that is Overthink Much?

I have this mental ideal that is embedded in my brain that I would be able to wake up and move forward with all my intentions.  I can see the clear direction and simple steps. I can envision all the "results" and the relief I make up those results would bring. 

One of the things I'm teaching myself to do - is try to write more from a professional voice for you instead of blab in inner processing out on this little white pop-up box. 

How's that working, Alli?

Buahahahah.... all my sweet and striving little parts trying to hold my life closely to that ideal.  I sense the squirm of these parts in my body even when my "thinking" is clear.

I now know this to be a signal for me to slow down and meet those parts with calm and curiosity. First, I must get past one of my sneakiest and most powerful partsโ€”my "awareness" part. This is not Awareness from my core self. 
In IFS - we call these self-like parts. The distinction is that the awareness part carries the burden and tone of "You're doing it wrong."

I asked my clients to notice the part of them that is "mindful and self-aware." What are the words that the voice uses? What is its tone? 

Is it SELF-calm and compassionate, deeply connected? Or is it cognitive and managerial with a motive? 

OOOOF...sending sweet love and compassion to all my thinking, overthinking, and trying-to-get-it-right-for-some-imaginaryideal-parts, and to yours. 

These parts need our somatic connection and attunement. They do not need judgment and alienation. They are scared and holding ages of fear and pain. 

Hello, inner managers, and judgers, and thinkers.  I see you.  I am here for you.  I see your skills.  You have done nothing wrong.  No matter what you feel, you deserve more love, not less.  Let's just breathe together, and then you can share your fears and concerns.  I am here for you.  I will not leave you.
This sweet girl. Only a few taco Tuesdayโ€™s left This sweet girl. Only a few taco Tuesdayโ€™s left before they move across the state.
In the IFS community, we call triggers "trailheads In the IFS community, we call triggers "trailheads" or say, "This part of me is really activated." Identifying and caring for emotionally reactive parts gives us the opportunity to respond with intention rather than impulsively. By practicing emotional regulation and internal partswork, you can create space between stimulus and response, allowing for more thoughtful and grounded decision-making.
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For me, it was the fear I would disintegrate and b For me, it was the fear I would disintegrate and be insignificant.  For many, it's attached to conditional love.  IFS coaching helped me in places typical coaching couldn't.  It helped me compassionately understand and connect with these parts - and ya know what? They began to relax, build trust, and step back, leaving space for my natural creativity, grounded confidence, and clarity to lead in my work & life.  This is available to you.  #ifscoaching
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