Allison Crow

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Biz Secrets, Coaching, Life Coaching, My Mentors, Uncategorized, Unleash Your Moxie

Why I’m AWESOME and how YOU CAN BE TOO

March 30, 2014

Woke up thinking about coaching – probably because I went to bed reading Amir Karkouti‘s latest book, “Lessons From My Coach.” What comes next is said with a calm and frank energy:

I’ve been coaching for 8 years. And all 8 years – frankly, I’ve kicked ass at it – with heart and financially. I’ve only had 1 year under 6 figures and it was the first year after I left kw and went from 47 clients to 1. And that was still an 80k year (gross if I’m gonna be totally honest). Today there are 2 new client inquiries in my inbox. It just works for me…it is my soul work – that thing that I can’t not do. 

 

I am still Learning

People wanna know– WHAT DID I DO? HOW DID I DO IT? – There are only really two core answers (both things that my coach Rich Litvin and my powerful colleague Amir talk about on a regular basis:

1. I DO IT MY WAY – Even when I was at KW – I was so good- by being me (combo of awesome + deeply committed to extreme learning and skills) I made then tons of $$$ so they tolerated MY WAY– I was scolded like a child at every turn because I broke the mold. I’m a bit crass, have a mouth like a sailor, heart of gold, and a passion that won’t quit. I like to stand tall and speak my truth and I have a relentless belief in my clients and the people I serve. When I left and started my solo practice – It took me a few more years to shed off all the “shoulds” of coaching. To refine MY WAY even more. And to this day, as I change, MY WAY continues to evolve. I continue to experiment and follow my feel good in my life, and in my coaching practice. I DO IT MY WAY – in full color, with fairy wings, and rainbows and art, and energy practices, naps, and all the other things that make my practice and my work uniquely me.

2. PLAY FULL OUT. I have had a coach that “I couldn’t afford” every single day since September 19th, 2003. I do not need a coach. I choose to hire the best so that I can become the best. I do not believe or buy into what my coaches say. I am my own Guru. I learn, experiment, I test, and I am continually making my own personal tincture of what works for me. I trust my gut – and my gut says GO FOR IT FULL OUT.
I read, I learn, and I take inspired action. I give it a go. I have given so many proposals that have just been returned with a blank stare or non response – and I keep connecting, loving, coaching, and proposing deep coaching relationships. I hold nothing back in life, on Facebook (clearly  ). I go to my edge almost every day, and I take my clients to their edge. We get naked. We go THERE – and then we take what we learn out in to the world – FULL OUT. And lives change. Glorious amazing shit happens.

So if you wanna become great – you get to PLAY THE LONG GAME (another Litvin lesson) – where for the rest of your life you are committed to discovering and doing it YOUR WAY, and to PLAYING FULL OUT.

What does that look like in your life? I’d truly love to know – I see your power. Let me know — STAND TALL IN YOUR POWER with the same calm and resolved power with which this message was written. What is possible if you were to TRULY DO IT YOUR WAY, and if you were to decide today, TO PLAY FULL OUT?

Loving you – Allison

 

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by allisoncrow 

About allisoncrow

Advanced Personal Development Life Coach for Experienced Business Owners & Execs💛Author, Art, & Dogs

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previous article: HOW DID I DO IT?
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Comments

  1. Anne says: April 3, 2014 at 7:05 pm

    Allison, I am so pumped to PLAY FULL OUT and do it MY WAY!!! Thanks for the support and validation it doesn’t have to be anyone else’s recipe. 🙂

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𝐄𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐧 𝐄𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐦𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐱𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐯𝐨𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐝—they’re messages from different parts of you. Rather than labeling them as good or bad, approach them with curiosity. Each emotion is a part of your system trying to communicate something important about your needs. By listening with empathy to these parts, you deepen your understanding of yourself and build emotional intelligence. This practice of compassionate inquiry helps you strengthen your connection to your internal experience and empowers you to respond in a way that aligns with your true Self.
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Overthink Much? I have this mental ideal that is Overthink Much?

I have this mental ideal that is embedded in my brain that I would be able to wake up and move forward with all my intentions.  I can see the clear direction and simple steps. I can envision all the "results" and the relief I make up those results would bring. 

One of the things I'm teaching myself to do - is try to write more from a professional voice for you instead of blab in inner processing out on this little white pop-up box. 

How's that working, Alli?

Buahahahah.... all my sweet and striving little parts trying to hold my life closely to that ideal.  I sense the squirm of these parts in my body even when my "thinking" is clear.

I now know this to be a signal for me to slow down and meet those parts with calm and curiosity. First, I must get past one of my sneakiest and most powerful parts—my "awareness" part. This is not Awareness from my core self. 
In IFS - we call these self-like parts. The distinction is that the awareness part carries the burden and tone of "You're doing it wrong."

I asked my clients to notice the part of them that is "mindful and self-aware." What are the words that the voice uses? What is its tone? 

Is it SELF-calm and compassionate, deeply connected? Or is it cognitive and managerial with a motive? 

OOOOF...sending sweet love and compassion to all my thinking, overthinking, and trying-to-get-it-right-for-some-imaginaryideal-parts, and to yours. 

These parts need our somatic connection and attunement. They do not need judgment and alienation. They are scared and holding ages of fear and pain. 

Hello, inner managers, and judgers, and thinkers.  I see you.  I am here for you.  I see your skills.  You have done nothing wrong.  No matter what you feel, you deserve more love, not less.  Let's just breathe together, and then you can share your fears and concerns.  I am here for you.  I will not leave you.
This sweet girl. Only a few taco Tuesday’s left This sweet girl. Only a few taco Tuesday’s left before they move across the state.
In the IFS community, we call triggers "trailheads In the IFS community, we call triggers "trailheads" or say, "This part of me is really activated." Identifying and caring for emotionally reactive parts gives us the opportunity to respond with intention rather than impulsively. By practicing emotional regulation and internal partswork, you can create space between stimulus and response, allowing for more thoughtful and grounded decision-making.
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For me, it was the fear I would disintegrate and b For me, it was the fear I would disintegrate and be insignificant.  For many, it's attached to conditional love.  IFS coaching helped me in places typical coaching couldn't.  It helped me compassionately understand and connect with these parts - and ya know what? They began to relax, build trust, and step back, leaving space for my natural creativity, grounded confidence, and clarity to lead in my work & life.  This is available to you.  #ifscoaching
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