In conversation with my coach (and my therapist) – when I tap into the clarity of where I’m pulled to BECOME, the light shows up in my eyes in one instant, and then in the next, I hit the gaping space between where I am and where I want to go…
And I wobble.
My voice begins to shake, and my stomach gurgles – my brain amps up her stories and excuses. The doubt fires up and conspires with all the reasons not to grow.
And my coach, Tony, lifts his hand and vibrates it horizontally where I can see it – to remind me of the wobble that happens when we are attuning to something new. It’s a visual anchor to remind me to slow down and be with what I call the wobble. While he shakes his hand – he often says, “I’ve got you.”
The Wobble is a Part of the Human Experience.
This week, I also saw the wobble:
- In a few of my clients, as they saw the responsibility they were pushing away instead of rising in their leadership
- In one of my writing colleagues as she hit a grand new awareness about who she is becoming through writing her story
- In a high school friend who was sharing some of her tender therapy realizations with me over a salad and a bowl of mac and cheese at Panera.
- In a few of my clients as they bravely navigate becoming their more authentic selves even when the world asks for them to “fit in.”
- In a precious friend who held a hospice vigil with her dying mother.
The Wobble is Not a Weakness
- It is a sign you are building strength and new muscle memory.
- It is a sign you are attuning to new experiences.
- It is a sign you are attuning your nervous system to a new state of capacity and calm in the face of doubt and fear.
- It is a sign you are stretching.
- It is a sign of the becoming you are in the middle of. (yes, I ended that with a preposition).
- If you are a goal person – it is proof you are making progress toward that outcome.
The wobble, the soreness, and sometimes even big trembles are what live in the space between your atrophy and comfort — and the being or doing you are growing into.
- How will you hold the wobble? In your mind with your thoughts? In your body?
- I offer to you to slow down, and hold the discomfort with compassion and strength.
- I plant the seed of remembering, “YES – this is growth, and it’s working,” when the discomfort rises up and starts to freak you up.
- And finally, I invite you to be the one that says to all parts of you, “I’ve got you.”
“Where have you atrophied?” is a question I’ve been considering for myself and offering to my clients.
My wise inner self shows me were it’s time for me to build strength and courage to be with the wobble. Yours can show you too.
And if you are looking for a coach to help support you – one who can say, “I’ve got you,” as you lean in, I can help with that.
Here are a few ways I can support you.
This is the work I am helping my business owner clients do. These are the conversations in my book Unarmored: Finding Home in The Wild Edges of Being Human. This is some of the focus of my live event Camp Cultivate in May, and this is the foundation from which we do group life and business coaching in my small membership program, Soulies: Self Leadership Society.
