For years I have been good at connecting with YOU, while still protecting and disconnecting from me. (This strategy is ineffective).
My nervous system was conditioned to assess threat- yours is too… and because I didn’t know internal connection and safety – I tried to get it from others or in my thinking. So much of the coaching and personal development work I’ve been trained in – leaves out some crucial embodied work.
Nope. Changing your thinking won’t change your life….. unless your nervous system is regulated and we can create internal emotional SELF-presence and connection.
Self-Leadership is about how you BE with all parts of you- especially the activated, uncomfortable, controlling parts of you.
It’s not what we SAY to ourselves- even though countless thought leaders and coaches will tell you that. Hell, half the time that language upgrade is the same empty experience we had as a child and so it just reinforces the lack.
For example: if you had a caretaker tell you all the right things, but there was no calm or connection in their bodies for you to co-regulate with— this disconnect impacts our self-trust.
Everyone is selling the result. I wanna give you the process.
Build your SELF-connection, SELF-presence, and SELF-compassion muscles as a WAY of BEING in the world.
This isn’t an insight change. It requires physical and embodied attention and time on task.
This is capacity.
Everything you want is on the other side of building your capacity.
Love Allison.
Soulies is a coaching membership where we are building our capacity together. Join us ASAP because the price structure is changing in May. Www.coachwithallison.com
PS:
Highly Sensitive people, Neurodivergent people- you are not broken or crazy. Nothing is wrong with you. You are just in a world that asks you to mask… you’ve been extra trained to be disconnected from yourself. I’m learning so much about our “ways of being” that are just different … but once understood, they make so much sense.
PSS: This is my business plan- I’m giving it to you for free.